There is this perception that wedding planning is “supposed” to be stressful. You are spending a pretty penny on one day (albeit a very special day, but one day nonetheless), you are bringing together two families with all different dynamics, and there are a million things to keep straight… that just sounds stressful, so I understand why most people think wedding planning = stress. Here’s the thing though… it doesn’t have to be overwhelmingly stressful to the point that you cringe anytime you think about opening your planning binder or looking at your emails. Here are three tips to help make this highly emotional time a little more enjoyable!
1. Hire a planner or coordinator. A planner may feel like an “extra” expense, but I promise you the overall relief you will feel from the time saved, avoided headaches, and sense that someone has your back on one of the most special days of your life… it’s worth it! A planner or coordinator is a third-party vendor hired by YOU (the major difference from a venue coordinator - check out this other blog if you want a further explanation between the two) to make sure everything is flowing as planned, set up as envisioned, and everyone is playing by the rules. This role is a vital part of your wedding vendor team if you want to make sure you are keeping wedding stressors to a minimum. Also, I am here to tell you there is no such thing as a “day-of coordinator”. You have put so much time and energy into planning your wedding, it is absolutely unrealistic to think that a person can come in the day-of (or even the day before) and execute your vision perfectly without a lot of questions and probably some hiccups. So keep in mind when you are looking at coordinators that having two, sometimes even three, meetings beforehand is going to make a world of difference!
2. Be organized! I do this for a living, and I still write everything down! It may be because I have had two kids and my brain is still recovering, BUT also because organization helps ensure things are not falling through the cracks or getting missed. Do not rely on your memory of past conversations or internal to-do lists. Checklists, worksheets (timelines, layouts, budgets), email folders, all things that will help give you a paper trail to go back to and keep you on track. And if you haven’t subscribed to our monthly newsletter, please remember to do so because at the end of this month (February 2024) I will be dropping some super valuable templates and worksheets to help start off your wedding planning journey on the right foot, so you will want to jump on that!
3. Plan the event you want to plan, not the one other people are telling you to plan or the one you see on Instagram. Let me just go ahead and shout this one from the rooftops with a megaphone. It is so important to plan a wedding that is authentically you. Once you drop the, sometimes overwhelming, feeling of pleasing everyone or constantly trying to follow current trends your stress will start to naturally subside. If you focus on the aspects of why you want to host a wedding and what your purpose & intentions are, it will make wedding planning feel a lot easier and probably more fun. Everyone wants the wedding where guests are walking away going, “man that wedding was perfect for so & so”. This feeling is more easily accomplished by just doing it for you and not getting so wrapped up in doing it for the ‘gram or for a person other than you & your partner. Sure, take inspiration from what you see and what you like (obviously that’s why there is Pinterest), but there is no need to carbon copy what other people are doing - especially if it doesn’t fit within your budget or make sense for the overall vision of the day.
My hope is that even after reading this short blog post you can take a big breath and go “okay, we have a plan, we can do this”. It doesn’t have to be hard just because people around you are saying you should be stressed or because your best friend was stressed planning their wedding so you should probably be stressed too. You can only eat and elephant one step at a time… think of wedding planning the same way. List it all out and take in everything one.. step.. at.. a.. time. And remember to have a planner/coordinator in your corner because on top of being organized, we are also really good listeners!
If you want to check out how I can help make your own planning journey, head over to my services page and fill out the contact form at the bottom!